Hi Reader,

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I was a guest on a podcast last week. I’m being interviewed on a number of them in the next coming months (I’ll be sure to post them here when they air) and I love, love, love getting to talk about doulas and the tremendous impact they make in people’s lives, whether during birth, death, divorce, cancer, gender transition, dementia, surgery, pet loss, or any challenging life situation.

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My favorite question I was asked? What’s the difference between a doula and a coach?

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It’s such a great question because herein lies the magic of the doula role...

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A coach:

• Typically works with a client for an extended period of time: 6 months, a year, many years.
• Usually focuses on a specific area of life: sports, personal development, work, relationships, health, business, writing a book.
• Helps clients set goals and create strategies to achieve their goals.
• Offers information, tools, skills, emotional support, and recommendations.
• Meets with clients on a regular, routine basis.
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A doula:

• Works with a client around a specific life event that has a significant emotional and/or physical challenge: birth, end-of-life, miscarriage, fertility treatment, adoption, cancer care, surgery, menopause, incarceration, psychedelic therapy. The working relationship may last days, weeks, months, but rarely more than a year.
• Views challenging life events as a rite of passage with the potential for great transformation if the experience is held in a sacred container, witnessed, and integrated afterward.*
• Helps clients identify desires and concerns around the event, and creates strategies to alleviate their concerns and achieve their desired outcomes.
• Offers information, tools, skills, emotional support, but doesn’t make recommendations.
• Knows relaxation, stress-reduction, and coping skills for themselves and their clients.
• Meets with clients for a prescribed number of visits: planning, check-ins, the event itself, post-event visits to process what happened, and integration.*
• Accompanies their client during part or all of the specific event*
• Advocates for their clients' wishes with others.
• Understands the intersection of culture, politics, family, and belief systems on a person’s experience.*
• Works in a trauma-informed way.*

*Not all doulas do this, but it’s how I train doulas to provide maximum humanistic support.

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There are additional nuanced differences around the special communication skills doulas use, the way information is shared, what advocacy looks like, and the depth of trust that is created very quickly.

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The key difference, though, is recognizing the significant emotional or physical challenge of the life situation they are working with. Yes, it can be emotional to start a business, write a book, or change jobs. Or physically difficult to train your body or change your diet. But those emotional or physical impacts are nothing compared to getting a cancer diagnosis, having a baby, or dying.

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I’ve seen people call themselves website doulas, business doulas, and writing doulas. And I bet those folks are more tuned in to the emotional aspects of those endeavors than the average coach (chances are, they are former doulas). But there is no single event (or series of events outside of typical life) that is going to occur, and they aren’t going with their client to a hospital, adoption agency, courtroom, or jail as part of their services.

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What makes doulas so unique are the Core Principles and Unique Skills of a doula. There’s no other job in the world that creates such compassion, humility, and trust in such a short period of time.

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You can learn all about a doula’s skills and the many varied doula roles in my book, So You Want to Be a Doula. If you know someone who would make a great doula, send them a copy. If you’re looking for a career change or to enhance your current healing or helping role, you’ll get plenty of ideas in this book. It’s now available to order directly from the publisher if you are avoiding Amazon these days.

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Well, once again, I’m thrilled I got to talk about doulas today. I hope you are inspired to find, be, or support a doula.

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What I'm listening to, reading, and watching:

​When Women Were Dragons — Kelly Barnhill. A beautiful story from the eyes of a young girl in the 1950s, when women were so fed up with patriarchy they combusted into dragons, burning down their Good Housekeeping homes and eating their oppressive husbands in an instant. The societal, educational, and familial dysfunction is captured so eloquently you can’t help but seethe and want to combust yourself. (P.S. This is the “great again” era MAGA dreams of. Read it as an allegorical tale.)

​Def Comedy Jam — I’ve been listening to stand-up comedy while doing a huge jigsaw puzzle (cuz you don’t really need to watch stand-up comedy!). This popular comedy show from the 1990s came on and I was appalled—APPALLED—at every comedian’s reference to p*ssy, Brokeback Mountain (homophobia was a huge thing in the Black community back then), and making fun of audience members’ clothing. I don’t recommend.

What are you listening to, reading, or watching that you think I’d like? Reply and let me know.

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Let me know if there's anything special you'd like to hear about in the coming weeks. Just reply and I'm on it!

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Wishing you the support of a doula for all of your life’s challenging situations.

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Thanks for reading,

Carrie

Author, ​So You Want to Be a Doula​​

​​​Website​​​​

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P.S. Have a favorite podcast you think I’d be a great guest for? Reply here and let me know about it!

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P.P.S. Here are all the ways I support doulas:

​Becoming a Birth Doula Online Doula Training (WA State Approved for certification)

​All Doulas Training: Essential doula skills for any type of doula​

​JumpStart Your Doula Career — business coaching for doulas

​Advanced Doula Trainings — (get flash discounts or bundle for more savings) Placenta Encapsulation Training, TENS Unit Training, Powerful Prenatals, The Doula Success Formula: The 5 Simple Steps to Getting More Clients, Wellness Workshop, Start Your Doula Business, Marketing for Doulas, Advanced Prenatal Visits, Advanced Postpartum Visits, Business Systems to Make Your Doula Life Easier, Develop Your Advanced Soulful Self

​Books for Doulas — So You Want to Be a Doula, Becoming a Doula Journal, The Doula Success Formula

​Business Coaching​

​Website Design or Copywriting (special discounts for doulas)

​Website Review & Recommendations​

Have questions? Schedule a free consult.​