This doula won’t leave me alone


Hi Reader,

There’s this doula who keeps nagging me.

She wants me to be like her but I keep telling her, I’m not a doula anymore.

She reminds me to be kind and compassionate with everyone, even if they’re mean ("Remember, hurt people hurt people," she says).

She tells me to stop and listen to what someone is saying and quiet my own mind so I can really hear them.

She’s all deep and woo-woo and talks about holding space for people when they’re going through challenging times.

She reminds me to slow down because everything has its own pace and you can’t force it.

She says change is inevitable and that we’re all going through countless transitions, so let go.

Everything she says is true, but the constant reminders? Geez, give me a break.

I don’t have to do those things anymore since I’m not a doula, right?

But damn, she gets me every time!

Because that nagging doula is me.

She’s been patiently watching me veer off on different paths for the past decade, losing some bits of who I am along the way. And now she’s trying to doula me back to my true self.

Being a doula is my throughline (the consistent element or theme in parts of the whole in films, stories, or books).

When I look back on the past 10 years, my doula identity is woven throughout.

Be of service. Be curious. Be heart-centered. Work from the place of the feminine. Seek to make experiences better.

When I retired from being a doula in 2015, I focused on training doulas and launched my JumpStart Your Doula Career program. During the pandemic, I transitioned to marketing and copywriting.

Every iteration of what I did came from a place of empowering others. How can I listen to my students better? How can I trust whatever they say they need and provide it? How can I help them decide which next move to make in their career?

No matter what I did, I couldn’t not be a doula.

So it’s no surprise that I’m back training doulas again. And providing business coaching for doulas.

And that I just wrote 2 new books for doulas that are just a few weeks away from being published.

I’ve learned that you can be a doula in so many situations outside of birth (in fact, my new book, So You Want to Be a Doula, outlines 17 types of doulas that aren’t related to the childbearing year).

Do you know your throughline? Think about it for a while and reply with:

Here’s my throughline Carrie: _______

I can’t wait to hear about it!


Here’s what’s going on with me this week:

No ‘Ask Carrie Anything’ live Q&A call this month since it falls on July 4 (be sure to look for next week’s email to learn about my version of patriotism, though).


On sale this week:

The Art of Doula Networking: Cultivating Relationships, Referrals, and Backups only $17!


What I’m listening to, reading, and watching:

Golden — Jill Scott. My new anthem and morning dance song. A great way to start the day! ☀️

Women of the Celts — Jean Markale. A dense, historical dive into the rich heritage of Celtic women in history, myth, and ritual. It pisses me off how much the understanding of women’s traditional roles in societies has been ruined. This book shows how ancient traditions compare to modern attitudes toward women, and reveals a world where both man and woman become whole by honoring the feminine principle rather than killing it.

Outstanding: A Comedy Revolution — A heart-warming and celebratory exploration of the history of LGBTQ+ comedians. Who’d have thunk that some of the favorite comedians of my 1960s childhood (Lily Tomlin, Paul Lynde, Charles Nelson Reilly, Rip Taylor) would one day be acknowledged as queer? It’s progress but a crime they couldn’t fully express themselves all their lives. On Netflix.

What are you listening to, reading, or watching that you think I’d like? Reply and let me know.


Let me know if there’s anything special you’d like to hear about in the coming weeks. Just reply and I’m on it! ​

Thanks for reading, ​

Carrie ​

Becoming a Birth Doula

​Website​​

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P.S. I’ve got room in my schedule for one more website client. If you’re struggling to figure out exactly how to sell what you offer, start with this question: Who do I care most about helping?

(For me, it’s people who want to change the world through love, kindness, support, and critical action.)

If you — or someone like you — want to attract more clients with a website that makes your ideal clients’ skin tingle, schedule a free call to find out how to do that.

Carrie Kenner

Interested in becoming a doula, marketing your doula business, or what keeps a person (me) motivated and engaged in this work for over 20 years? Join my weekly newsletter on doulas, writing, ponderings on life and whatever is feeding my fire at the time, and get freebies and special discounts on courses.

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